You can’t start a fire, sittin’ ’round cryin’ over a broken heart
This gun’s for hire even if we’re just dancing in the dark

You can’t start a fire, worryin’ about your little world falling apart
This gun’s for hire even if we’re just dancing in the dark

I heard this song so many times before. But I guess it is just like any other piece of art. It has its magic to be heard differently every time. The strong lyrics in it always forced me to think about my future and my past and present. But I can proudly say that with the end of the previous year I allowed my little world to fall apart. It is not easy in my heart to let go some people and things however its the thing that I had to do and that now enables me to go forward.

Next steps

Passed year showed me that good, funny and exciting things happen when I let go of everything that I know and that is how I probably invited those things to happen. I wish that this year would be as exciting and surprising as it was last year.  However what is most important for me at this moment is to not back down to stay true to myself. I left a big part of my life behind and I kind of need to set up a new one and this means a lot of work and inner strength that I know and believe that I have.

Even now the biggest fear is that I do not know what will happen next. I do not know what to do. I said to myself that I will try to work this out day by day and it is funny as I do not know what to do tomorrow except to go to work and to spend 2 hours on my master-thesis. But what will happen inside me on my emotional level, spiritual level, and mental level? I do not know. I am a bit afraid but still inside me I feel that I made the right move and I hope that I will make it through the day.

One thing I know for sure

 You can’t start a fire, you can’t start a fire without a spark
This gun’s for hire even if we’re just dancing in the dark

I made a spark with this decision and action to say goodbye to some people who were my past. They are all past because a reason that when I was around them I could not express my dreamy side, my inner glow. And I could not be me in the form that I wish to be.

I can`t wait to see what kind of fire I started 🙂